Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Baby Shower Invite Etiquette

I may regret this post later, but for now - I'm letting my Asian bluntness take over!

My sister Kara and I have chuckled for the past few months as we've shared stories of the untactful ways of LDS women. I realize we are in no way perfect, so this is not a "holier-than-tho" moment by any means. I'm also aware posting something like this is def. going to offend someone but please be aware - it's not about anyone that will be reading this. (I would've made my blog private if I were worried about that!) :~)

I received an email last week for a baby shower. Ok, no big deal - an emailed invitation is acceptable in my book. Postage isn't cheap. I totally get it. But please tell me WHY it's ok for someone to use the Relief Society list that's intended for RS announcements, etc. - for an email blast for a baby shower?!?! Not only did I not know the woman they were honoring, I didn't even know the person that was throwing the shower! Am I the only person that finds this absolutely ridiculous?!


I'm fully aware that some women that have multiple showers are more often than not offered by someone in the ward and instead of declining and offending that person, (which happens way too often in the Church) they accept. I'm fine with multiple showers, especially if you're having a new gender. But if you already have 3-4 kids and the oldest if of babysitting age. . . you probably shouldn't be having/expecting someone to throw you a shower. (True Story)


Someone's offended huh? I love us Mormons. . .

THE CHURCH IS TRUE!

14 comments:

*Becky* said...

I can understand this. I think it's ridiculous. I can understand if they were trying to get to know you, but they could have come up to you in church for that matter. And people do get offended way too much. it's just dumb

Paige said...

I'm glad you posted this. Mostly because I wanted to post it on my blog but I was right in the thick of it & my friends would DEFINITELY have been offended. I was helping to throw a shower that my co-thrower wanted to be a "ward thing" & to invite EVERYONE in Relief Society. Thankfully, I knew the girl we were throwing the shower for (don't worry, it was her FIRST baby) didn't want the whole ward invited because like you & me she gets annoyed when invited to a shower for someone she doesn't know. It was a sticky situation for a day or two there but the shower was last weekend & the few people who were invited had a lovely time...without the entire ward being there. :) I'm SO not offended...

Kristin said...

I'm honestly surprised this is the first time it's happened to you. They use our Relief Society "newsletter" for that crap all the time. (and in previous wards I've been in)
I think it makes the invite optional and I don't feel obligated to go or get a present--works for me! (Maybe I'm the tacky one??!)

Meghan White said...

They have done that in my Ward too. In the newsletter like Kristin. But I have only gone to one cuz I acutally knew who she was.

Meghan White said...

PS. I don't know if you heard but the Mesa Temple Pres had to put out a letter to all the stakes. The letter was asking parents not to leave their young children at the visitor center while they go and do a session!! The letter said it is not the responsibility of the sister missionaries to babysit!! Seriously what is wrong with people!! Some Mormons out there!!!

Kara Jones said...

^what^? in regards to Meghan's information- I cannot believe the temple/dump your kids on the sister missionaries thing- what a joke!

Kara Jones said...

Let me just say, I feel like I could kick back, bust open a bag of chips and salsa while I comment on this topic. but I am gonna keep it brief- if you WANT a gift from me, send me a freakin' stamp. There's nothing wrong with being a penny pinch, but when you sacrifice courtesy, don't expect anything or have your feeling hurt that I didn't show. ha, let's see if anyone invites me to anything ever again.

Kara Jones said...

p.s. If i love you and you are having another baby, its likely i am gonna bring a gift to you-no invitation plus stamp necessary. In return I probably am gonna wanna hear your birth story cause i'm a total junkie. there, hopefully covered all my bases there.

Jazz and Rod said...

Ppl would leave their kids at the visitor's center?! Unreal...

Note to self - send invitation to my own sister or she won't bring me a gift or wanna hear my birth story. Got it.

Jordyn Perkins said...

Amen to that! And can I include bridal showers. If I haven't had any interaction with the family of the bride or the groom, if I do not KNOW the bride, do not send an invite. Those are personal things people! You don't just use everyone's RS list to get more gifts. I understand those that send it to all b/c they don't want to offend by leaving anyone out. In that case, I simply do not go. Guilt-free. And then I hope that I am not offending...

Seriously though, a baby shower for each gender, totally fine with me, but to quote Mrs. Jone, please have the courtesy to send a stamp if you want me to spend money on a gift (ok, I took a lot of liberty in that 'quote' there... :) It is the classy, tactful thing to do. (I do get there are exceptions out there, so this is just my opinion for the general public).

Good note to self too Jazz. =D HAha! In all seriousness my own mother expected a stamped invitation for my baby shower. Maybe that's where I get it from... HAhaha.

Carrie said...

Heres an Idea...crash the shower, pick up some free food. (maybe grab some to go) check out her gifts, if you see somethin you like, grab it and run like hell! Thats the beauty of not knowing the mom to be, Its guilt free! She obviously has no shame...why should you?? Fight fire with FIRE JAZZ!

Anonymous said...

I don't think it's right to just invite anyone to a party... you should at least know the person.

Chelsey Howard said...

LOL!! I think the same thing all the time. I always get invites and I don't even know the person. And it drives me nuts when the person already has 5 kids and they still have a shower?!?!?! I get if your family and close friends get you gifts or something, but an actual baby shower is crazy talk.

Jamie and David Nielson said...

I have nothing to say besides I totally agree with you and everyone that has commented!!